Thursday, 22 December 2011

'HELP' I've Reached That Age !

So yes I suppose I've been banging on a bit this last week about reaching 40 ! and whilst I don't really care that much, I have started to notice the odd sign that all is not as it was 10 years ago......The changes have been extremely subtle, sneaking up on me with the quiet stealth of a cat out to catch his mousey tea. So it's taken me a while to realise just how my ever advancing years are taking their toll. Here is my 'Help I've Reached That Age' List !!

40yr old me and wannabe Mum to JLS !
  1. My kids have started saying 'gosh don't the days and weeks just fly by'? If my children are realising how quickly time passes then it means they're getting older and that I'm now REALLY old !
  2. Whenever possible (even in bed) I wear the most supportive bra money can buy .....otherwise my boobs could easily be mistaken for spaniels ears....or as Mr Poshbird affectionately calls them 'slate hangers nail bags' !
  3. When reading the Sunday magazine supplement, in all seriousness, I find myself considering buying the elasticated jeans for £19.99.  My desire to feel comfortable over being stylish is becoming a much higher priority when choosing clothes these days!
  4. I now avoid kneeling down at all costs...these days I can't get up without looking like a pissed up, decrepit, crab staggering it's way back from a boozy night in the 'Coach and Seahorses'!
  5. Seeing my 16yr old daughter wearing the 'exact' same outfits that I did back in 1984. I'm soooo old that the 80's fashions from my youth have actually come back around for the second time !
  6. Being told by my kids that it's unacceptable to say certain phrases when speaking, like 'awesomes, totes amaze, well jell, reem and whatever ' !
  7. Saying how 'fit' the JLS boys are, only to be told (again by my kids) how that's 'disgusting and weird and that I could actually be their mother' ! Well I guess they have a fair point :(
  8. I always talk about 'taping' a programme......but what I really mean is Sky Plus - ing it , which I still fully don't understand if I'm honest. I mean how can you actually pause live TV? It's incredible, it's altering time! it's like something out of Dr Who !
  9. Not having any of the techno gadgets everyone else seems to have....iphones, ipads, ipods....all I have is my i..ron !
  10. Going up to bed earlier than my kids, I now frequently go up before my 16yr old and also on the odd occasion even before my 9yr old !
  11. Obsessively checking my handbag before I leave the house to make sure I have my 'readers, gaviscon and windeeze tablets' ! Sad but very true and I can't believe that I've actually admitted to this one !
  12. Learning to 'love' my bunion and purchasing only 'sensible' yet funky shoes/boots. Needless to say I live in DM's and Fitflops.
  13. Whilst camping for the first time last year, Mr Poshbird and I began fantasising about owning a caravan in a few years time and spending all summer touring the UK. WTF ?? It's never sunny here and a caravan would require us to spend long periods of time together, in what's essentially a box on wheels ! Don't old people do this type of thing?!
Miss C 80's style !
OK so this is just weird....Sorry !

So that's it I reckon, well for now ! I'd love to hear what makes you feel old, if you feel like sharing your thoughts with an (old)Poshbird !



  1. Yep...done all that...well perhaps not the windeze tablets!!

  2. Kelli Carpenter
    Pissed decrepit crab........I was dying of laughter. Ok here's me list : yep we 'tape' programmes too!! Have even occassionally caught myself saying video, when in fact we've rented a DVD and dinosaurs remember videos. My anti wrinkle eye cream actually works....meaning I had bloody wrinkles and bags in the first place. Most scarily I find myself saying "come on you're just being silly now" to Soph something I swore never to say to my kids! I see kids on the street and am horrified by what they're allowed out in despite being a fashion horror myself centuries ago. Was torn between fancying Zach Efron a while ago and being scared I should be worried about the fact he's five years old!! And most of all I also ALWAYS choose comfort over style now cos I'm too damn tired and old to care !!!!! Xxx

  3. Kelli !

    Send me the wrinkle cream ! Although I have my doubts you use any ;) you gorgeous creature <3 xx

  4. funny post!! And one I can relate to having reached the very old state of 47 (age is just a number, age is just a number...)Like your blog! x

  5. Well when my daughters are trying to talk about the old days like almost prehistoric times they think the most far back is the 80s. They say 'oh the second world war, did that happen in the 80s?' And I just sigh. I hear you on the elasticated trousers and I am ipad illiterate!

  6. Yep...that's weird...fancying those JLS boys. Who in their right minds would do that *scrolls up the page and drools over the photo*. I mean... A six pack? Yuk. Weird...


    *smoothes back hair and composes self*. We might be older enough to be their mother, but we're also old enough to Cougar it up, baby!! Whoop. Whoop. I'm in! ;)

  7. Cougar it up it !! Come here little JLS boys......Amanda and I want to show you something ;) ;)

  8. How funny !! I caught myself saying I was going to tape a programme the other day. My dad said even he as an oldie sky plusses programme now haha

    I can't believe how much i laughed reading this as it (almost!) all rings true. I have the pleasure (if you can call it that) of hitting the big number later this year - a definitely scary thought on how this could have possibly happened. Also what do i do to celebrate?! Kids want a party that goes on until 1am !! Thats the middle of the night surely ..... 

  9. Awe thanks for reading and commenting, it's so lovely when people do :)
    You're so right about this age sneaking up on you! I still 'feel' 25 but sound just like my Mother !
    Oooh have a party but start it at lunchtime then you can still be tucked up in bed with coco by 10.30pm ;) xxx